December 19, 2024

Coach Bill Belichick reportedly dismisses critical comments about the 48-year difference with girlfriend Jordon Hodson, as “both have a love for nature and the outdoors.” Their favorite topics? The forest, “Say it in my good ear!”, and AJ—Jordan’s NBA ex when Bill’s out of town.

(real story)

A Japanese inventor’s currently working on a “human washing machine” that would automate showering. The main obstacle’s how to wash away desires of drinking Sydney Sweet’s toothpaste spit.

(real story)

Netflix is scaling back to a few months its policy of unlimited parental leave. Hours after the unlimited leave ban, black market value for Nick Cannon sperm shot up.

(real story)

In Zimbabwe, a condom shortage has sex workers using baby socks instead.

The country’s new problem:

Pregnant baby feet.

(real story)

Professional back scratchers, who provide sensual touch throughout the body, say their therapy is “purely for pleasure and nothing else, but not in a sexual way.”

WOMEN: “It’s not serious if I didn’t swallow!” (real story)